Pondering Good Leaders

After a rather busy stretch of work, I'm finally able to take a break and post some of last week's thoughts on this, my day off.

One of the books I started reading was John Maxwell's 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader. It's a bit odd, really, that I'm reading no less than 3 books at present: JRR Tolkien's Fellowship of the Ring for the past few weeks to the kids (with all my voice characterizations as I go), and a 2-book series entitled: Gemworld by John Vorholt. And...this doesn't include the books on CD I'm listening to as I commute the 46 miles to and from my work. Scary...I don't think of myself as a reader.

The Maxwell book begins with a rather unique preface extolling the reader to make it a book to ponder through. It would be an otherwise easy read and could be consumed in one sitting. But Maxwell asks the reader not to take that approach, and instead slowly digest each chapter as you feel your way through the book topic by topic. Apparantly one of Maxwell's friends did this while leading their company with his hallmark 21 Indisputable Laws of Leadership book -- purposefully considering each "law" and it's application through the week.

So that's where I began with chapter 1...about "Character". There were some damning ideas in there as to the person I've been in my life (and an encounter with the wife later the same day I read Chapter 1 did nothing to assuage my own critical opinions of self). We can all look at our past and dwell on the times where we've displayed anything other than the qualities of integrity, humility, faithfulness, etc. But the point of the chapter -- to be a person of character as the first indispensible quality of a leader -- is one that I otherwise feel pretty good about. (This chapter can be found electronically here.)

[Rant on]At this point, I'd like to do a quick side rant about John Maxwell. In my opinion, he's a smart guy and who has surrounded himself with smart people. But I despise anything that comes to a nice, neat number. If the first "21" book didn't raise the question, matching the number on the 2nd book certainly reinforced my annoyance that there was at least as much marketing awareness in the scribing of his tome as there was about Indispensability. Another annoyance is Maxwell's penchant to convey his ideas that seem to be "pre-conceived opinion that he looks to invoke into his material" rather than genuine observation born out of extensive research.[Rant off]

All that said, I know he's done more thinking and study on the topic of Leadership than most anyone else, and I do (generally) appreciate the challenge of reading through his materials. More times than not, I agree with his observations and am certainly appreciative of his work.

Now...this is a long-winded introduction to the musing that was spurred on by my foray into Maxwell's op-ed on the qualities of a leader. As I sat in my office (so glad to not be in a cube!), I meandered through the leaders that I thought were very solid.

As the names floated by, I was surprised to discover a common thread: 3/4ths of the best leaders I've known were women.

My first thought was, "Wow...I'm getting hungry." (It was late in the day.)

My next thought (which actually coincides with this journal and less with my desire to dine) was, "Why women? And what are the traits of these leaders that stand out? What are some of those things I admire and strive to attain?"

Juxtaposed against this revelation was the next realization: that some of the worst leaders I've known have also been women.

So my musing was engaged in earnest as I considered why there were more excellent female leaders than male leaders in my experience.

The first epiphany was the ability of the excellent women leaders to be able to keep their eyes on so many balls. The female leaders I've known have been able to effectively keep their mind on everything that needs to be attended to without losing focus. The old generality/adage about women being able to multitask seemed to be in play. Compared to many men, I feel I do this well. Compared against these women who were excellent leaders, I pretty much suck. So it is a trait that I admire.

Prioritization was the next idea that came to the fore. Even though leaders have a responsibility to focus on several concerns simultaneously, they cannot all take the same level of priority. The leaders that did a great job of prioritization were able to see through the dust of rabid activity and ferret out the critical from the mundane. This quality was certainly the sibling of multitasking, though quite different. Being able to keep many balls airborne is a gift in itself, but being able to provide the right amount of thrust correlated to the weight of each suspended orb is of even greater value. And in my experience, women do this better than men.

The final consideration I had was the communication abilities of leaders. Now, I consider myself to be an excellent communicator -- meaning that I not only speak effectively, but also listen well (when not multitasking!). However, the individuals that I greatly admire for their effective communication are almost ALWAYS women. It's not just the effective ability to speak, it's the intuition with which they gauge the listener -- or audience -- and modify their message accordingly. While there can be great male speakers, very few seem to be able to modulate their approach as necessary. It's like there's a stronger connection with who they are and what their message is than there is a need to communicate in a way that the receiver will be able to envelop.

As I shared some of these thoughts with Mrs. Musings, she proposed another area of admiration that I was neglecting. Female leaders do a better job of caring for those under their purview than do male leaders. She attributed it to the concept of women looking out for their own as they are (generally) naturally-wired nurturers. I paused on this, and slowly came to agreement. One of the benchmarks of solid leadership is to examine the followers. Do they feel like they're being taken care of? Are they in touch with the direction they are being led? Do they feel like they can approach the leader with anything? After considering the male vs. female leaders I've known, I had to proffer agreement with the premise of her supposition. (That's a fancy way to say, "She was right!" without really having to admit it.)

The last addition -- also credited to Mrs. Musings -- was the idea of affirmation. In my experience, women are better at ensuring their followers are affirmed than are men. Thinking about that, I realized that affirmation isn't a one-size-fits-all crown that can be gifted to anyone. It's a tailor-made hat that uniquely fits its wearer, whether its a top hat, a ball cap, or a fedora. The key ingredient is that it reflects the individuality of the affirmed. And in my experience, the leaders who have best accomplished this are from Venus, while we Martians still have a lot to learn. ("Take me to your leader" anyone??)

All this said, the worst leaders I've known have also been women. Without the long diatribe, the common threads I've experienced are: micro-managing/controlling, manipulative, overly assertive, bullying, unforgiving, imposingly critical and self-absorbed. These are "leaders" who want it their way -- and don't want you in their way.

So...on my experiential "bell curve" of leadership, I think men occupy the "near average" area, while women occupy the "plus-or-minus-2-standard-deviations-from-the-mean" tails. (This is not to say that I've ne'er encountered some excellent male leaders. But their commonality is the military -- which puts more purposeful focus on leadership than any organization I've known. Again -- a musing for another day.)

What this thesis doesn't account for is pretty obvious: Me. There are replete opportunities where the (very) strong women in my life have prepared/damaged me to hold the unique receptors to female leadership that may taint my perspectives. (Just admitting that seems like it holds less sway than it would otherwise...)

But these are my musing for today, and if you're a good female leader -- be it at work, church or home -- then good on ya!